I stumbled across this video on Facebook a few weeks ago. It really stuck with me.
While discussing it with some Weight Watchers buddies, I had two thoughts:
I wish I could have the confidence and self image this girl has
I don't get internet haters. I don't understand the energy it takes to tear someone down.
Another person pointed out the irony in those two statements. I don't understand taking the energy to hate someone else, but I find the energy to hate myself?
It's just such a waste, I need to stop. I would never put up with someone else calling me fat or telling me I'm a failure because I had a bad week on the scale. My body can do pretty incredible things.
One of the first sermons I heard preached at my church was about love. The short version of the message was: Love is seeing things as they are, accepting them, and loving them anyway. It doesn't mean that you don't want to change the situation, but you do see its reality and still feel love and compassion.
I have to learn to apply that to my own body. I have to see my body as overweight, and love it anyway. No more ifs.
If I lose 50 pounds, I'll love my body. If my underarm stops jiggling, I'll love my body. If my thighs didn't rub together when I ran, I'll love my body. If I can run a marathon, I'll love my body.
But that's not how it works. That self loathing is just sucking up the energy I could be spending living my life. I don't have to wait until I'm perfect, because let's be honest, I'm never going to be perfect. I'm doing this because I love myself, not because I hate myself.
Wow, that feels good to write.